


Poptarts and Vodka Shots

by april_zephyr (April_Zephyr)



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Crack, Everybody Wants Stiles, F/M, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Platonic Female/Male Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-16
Updated: 2013-09-16
Packaged: 2017-12-26 19:12:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/969293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/April_Zephyr/pseuds/april_zephyr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The day started off stranger than usual. Lydia wasn’t usually this clumsy, first she managed to spill water on herself and now here she was falling, slipping on the not so dry floor. Why didn’t she listen to Erica and watch movies with her all day? But no, instead she insisted on buying lunch and groceries for the two because living off donuts and pretzel sticks was obviously not good for their healths. The impact of her back smacking the floor wasn’t as painful as she expected, thank god she didn’t smack her head.<br/>“Are you okay?” A voice asked.</p>
<p>“Do I look okay?” Lydia growled, she never understood why people insisted on asking obvious questions like: Did you cut your hair? Is that a new shirt? Did you steal my fries? What’s that on your face? Did you just kiss my husband?</p>
<p>“Not at all.” The voice sniggered, helping her to her feet.</p>
<p>“Jesus! Why are you so mean to me?” Lydia asked, noticing that the owner of the voice was none other than Stiles Stilinski.</p>
<p>“Stiles, not Jesus.” Stiles smirked, his oh so douche-y smile, “So Lyds, what brings you round this part of town? We were told to avoid your apartment like the plague so you two could have your “special” time.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Poptarts and Vodka Shots

**Author's Note:**

> Just wanted to make my Roswell fanfic into a Teen wolf one. It's practically the same with little differences. And I'm going to have to continue making correction because I totally missed some names.
> 
> I basically did it because I could and I really wanted to.

The day started off stranger than usual. Lydia wasn’t usually this clumsy, first she managed to spill water on herself and now here she was falling, slipping on the not so dry floor. Why didn’t she listen to Erica and watch movies with her all day? But no, instead she insisted on buying lunch and groceries for the two because living off donuts and pretzel sticks was obviously not good for their healths. The impact of her back smacking the floor wasn’t as painful as she expected, thank god she didn’t smack her head.  
“Are you okay?” A voice asked.

“Do I look okay?” Lydia growled, she never understood why people insisted on asking obvious questions like: Did you cut your hair? Is that a new shirt? Did you steal my fries? What’s that on your face? Did you just kiss my husband?

“Not at all.” The voice sniggered, helping her to her feet.

“Jesus! Why are you so mean to me?” Lydia asked, noticing that the owner of the voice was none other than Stiles Stilinski.

“Stiles, not Jesus.” Stiles smirked, his oh so douche-y smile, “So Lyds, what brings you round this part of town? We were told to avoid your apartment like the plague so you two could have your “special” time.”

“We needed food, you know having extreme amounts of unnecessary sex does that to a person. She tastes delicious by the way.” Lydia drawled, she knew that he would report back to his bro. His friend Jackson happen to be the the jerk-face that tried to have a bit of fun with Erica over the fall. Lydia didn’t trust him at all.

“I never pegged you for the type to bat for the same team.” Stiles grinned, “Do you need help with those bags?”

“I knew there was a reason I loved you.” Lydia breathed, watching Stiles lift the bags with ease.

“You only love me when I do things for you.”

“Well Stiles, you offered your manly muscles.” Lydia laughed, smacking his back a few times as she lead him out of the cafe.

“Be glad that midget strawberry blondes are my weakness.” Stiles declared in amusement as he continued to walk Lydia back to her and Erica’s apartment.

“I’m not that short.”

“5’3” is pretty short.”

“Freak. Why do you know my height?”

“Because I measured you for that science experiment? How do you not remember this?”

“Maybe because that was years ago.” Lydia laughed, “Well this is my stop and as you know you were told to avoid it like the plague so I suggest you turn around right now.”

“No goodbyes?”

“Bye Stilinski!” She smiled, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek. Lydia then continued to pry the bags out of his hands.

“Have fun.” He responded, waving as he continued walking.

As soon as Lydia walked into the house Erica was there quickly walking towards her and raising an elegant brow. Lydia placed the bags in the kitchen as Erica continued to follow her around like a lost puppy.  
“Can I have a shower first and then explain?” Lydia asked bluntly.

“Why don’t you have a shower and explain at the same time?” Erica countered, smiling knowingly when Lydia rolled her eyes.

“We are far too comfortable around each other.” Lydia sighed in defeat, finding a shirt and pair of shorts to wear after her shower.

“So strange considering the fact I hated you as a child.” Erica laughed, following Lydia as she made her way into the bathroom.

“The feeling was mutual.” Lydia grinned shrugging her clothes off and entering the shower. Erica just sat on the toilet seat and opened a magazine.

“Until we ended up in bed together naked with no recollection of what happened.”

“Strange.” Lydia smiled, turning the shower on, “Holy Fuck! Did you use all the hot water?”

“No! It was like that when I went in!”

“I’ll have to call someone to fix it.”

“Stiles is good at fixing stuff.”

“So is a plumber considering the fact that it’s he gets paid to fix stuff.”

“But Stiles will do it for free.”

“We’re taking advantage of him.”

“He loves us.” Erica stated, waiting a few minutes for Lydia to get out of the shower and get dressed, “So?”

“We’re not calling him...”

“He’ll look better than a plumber and you know it.”

“So you want me to call Stiles so that we can see him get wet?”

“Of course.”

“That’s awfully strange of you considering the fact that you were dry humping his ‘bro’ in the fall.”

“That was once and I was extremely drunk.”

“What happened to being gay?”

“I thought I was gay... But I’m not?”

“Probably because Lahey broke you with his dick. You thought that he would be tiny in order to compensate for his attractiveness.” Lydia cackled, dragging Erica to the couch.

“The most horrific virginity loss...” Erica stated, shuddering at the thought of it.

“Losing your virginity doesn’t always tend to be awesome.”

“I bet it was for you.”

“It was pretty sweet, probably one of the most romantic experiences I’ve ever experienced. We did it in an observatory, under the stars.”

“Really? We did it in my room and it was pretty romantic but kind of traumatizing.” Erica laughed, “So how is Argent doing?”

“My loss of virginity reminds you of Allison?”

“Well because you and Allison had a fight because you didn’t think to tell your best friend that you got laid.”

“You knew when I had sex?”

“Of course. You weren’t exactly subtle.” Erica asked curiously, “So who did you lose your virginity to? You seem to know about my experience far too well and I only knew that you had sex.”

“Well of course I know about it. You’re very honest when you’re drunk.”

“I can’t believe you took advantage of my not so sober self.”

“Fine! I’ll call Stiles, are you happy?”

“Yeah!” Erica laughed, “Can we start watching Twilight?”

“This is the last time I’m letting you pick a film. I swear that I will kick you out if you suggest another film that involves sparkly vampires.”

“I was just kidding. Can we watch Easy A.”

“It’s a good film, but it’ll never beat The Notebook.”

“After that, you’re calling Stiles.”

“You’re the one that wants him to do it. So you’re calling.”

“But you’re his favorite.”

“I hate you so much right now.”

“I love you too babe.”

“Keep your pants on.” Lydia laughed, starting the film.

As usual Emma Stone rocked the socks off of Erica and Lydia as they ate curly fries as a quick snack. They were both dressed in shorts and spaghetti straps. How the hell was Stiles going to deal with that?  
“Erica, I think we should change into sweats.”

“No. We’re wearing what we would normally wear when we’re home alone. Stiles doesn’t deserve special treatment.”

“Fine.” Lydia sighed, picking up her mobile and calling Stiles, “Hey Stiles, can you come over? The shower’s been acting up?”

**“You only call when you need something.”**

“I’ll make you food.”

**“I’ll be there in 15.”**

“See ya.” Lydia laughed, hanging up the phone.

“So?”

“He’ll be here in 15.”

“Awesome. So what are you cooking?”

“We’re going to cook pasta.”

“So damn lazy.”

“It’s better than a pop tart.”

“That was once.”

“Erica, a romantic date involves cooking actual food. It’s not surprise that he never came back.” Lydia laughed, getting the ingredients and equipment she needed.

“If you must know, I actually told him not to come back.”

“Keep telling yourself that.” Lydia grinned, as she waited for the pasta to cook.

“How does that count as cooking? You have ready made sauce!” Erica groaned, as she started to heat up the sauce.

“Do you know how long it takes to make sauce? We don’t even have any tomatoes.”

“Isn’t this far too much for three people?” Erica asked curiously.

“Well you’ve seen how Stiles eats and we’re going to be able to live off of this for the remaining part of the week.”

“Why can’t we have fresh food?”

“Erica! You ask far too many questions. Now it’s time for me to ask you a question. Are you willing to cook on a daily basis so that we don’t have to cook in bulk?”

“Oh hell no! You’ll be the one cooking.”

“That’s not lady like. You two should be splitting cooking duties between the two of you.” Stiles laughed as he entered the kitchen, it wasn’t until he was completely in that the two girls managed to catch the other figure with him. It was none other than Derek Hale, the brunette was as handsome as Lydia had remembered him to be. His hair had grown considerably longer and both girls had an urge to run their hands through his locks.

“You could have at least knocked.” Lydia sighed, turning her attention to the other male before turning back to Derek, “Hey Derek.”

“Hi. I hope that I’m not intruding, Stiles told me that he would need my help.”

“Of course not!” Erica smiled, “We made enough food to feed an army.”

“You mean I made enough food to feed an army.”

“I heated the sauce!”

“Exactly! I got all the dirty work of cooking the pasta and mixing the sauce in.”

“Did you make the spaghetti that used to make in high school?” Stiles asked curiously as he walked over to the bowl of pasta and took a curious sniff.

“Well not exactly like the one that I used to make in high school. This one was made with an already made sauce.”

“That’s a shame.”

“I swear you only used to hang around with me so that you could enjoy my cooking.” Lydia smiled, slapping Stiles’ shoulder slightly with the back of her hand.

“Wait. You two used to hang out in high school?” Erica asked, curiously.

“How far back are you Erica Reyes?” Stiles asked, laughing at the bewildered facial expression of the girl, “Lydia and I used to do lab work. This kinda feels like a really weird high school reunion.”

“Seriously! Why didn’t you tell me anything?” Erica asked Lydia, frowning at her friend’s amused face.

“Because it’s fun to see you learn something new about me everyday.”

“So. Was he the guy that you lost your virginity to?”

“Oh wow, it wasn’t me. And I don’t really want to hear who deflowered my little Lyds.” Stiles laughed, earning an thankful glance from petite lady.

“I think we should eat the pasta before it gets too cold.” Lydia smiled, taking her seat at the table. Erica sat directly opposite of Lydia, whereas Derek and Stiles took their places beside her. After a few minutes after everyone finished eating, Erica held Lydia’s gaze, this meant bad things where going to happen.

“Have you had sex with Derek.” Erica asked seriously.

“No she has not had sex with Derek! That goes against the bro code. Right?” Stiles spluttered, turning to his bro who’s eyes widened as he continuously to look more interested in his food.

“I don’t see Derek like that.” Lydia sighed, she knew this was going to happen one day. She ran her hand through her in a frustrated manner before she lifted herself off the seat and started gathering the plates. 

“Dude, you were just friendzoned.” Stiles grinned, earning a hearty laugh from Derek who also followed suit in Lydia’s movement.

“Let me at least help you with the washing.” Derek grinned, following the girl to the sink.

“I would appreciate it more if Erica did her part in washing the dishes. But as we both know, she won’t step near a sink in fear of breaking her nails.” Lydia laughed.

“Well I guess I’m going to have to do Erica’s job tonight.” Derek smiled, gently moving the girl away from the sink, “Maybe this is my way to say that you should help Stiles out with fixing the shower.”

“Nope. You just want to wash the plates because you don’t want to be wet from head to toe.”

“And?” Derek laughed as he started to wash the plates. He was always good at cleaning stuff, one of the pros of being friends with Derek was that he wouldn’t allow any mess around the house and would often clean up straight away, not like the average male.

“My body is ready.” Erica screamed huskily.

“Damn blondie, I didn’t know you were into me. Last I heard was that you went for girls.”

“Urgh. Okay, my body is so not ready anymore.” Erica sighed, “Derek you go be a man and help Stiles out with the shower.”

“Let me finish the dishes and then I’ll go help.” Derek groaned, finishing the last dish and wiping his hand clean with the dish towel. When Derek and Stiles disappeared to the bathroom, Erica turned to look at her friend knowingly.  
“We are not having this conversation.” Lydia stated, taking the words out of the girl’s mouth.

“Yes we are. So is this why you were weirded out by me almost hooking up with Jackson? He’s friends with Stiles, right?”

“No. I just didn’t want you to get hurt.”

“He hurt the infamous heartbreaker?”

“He didn’t hurt me. I just thought it would be one of those drunk college hook ups.”

“So that’s the only thing you were worried about?”

“Yes. I’m not like you, I didn’t react extremely weird when Isaac started banging Allison.”

“Isaac was my first everything. You can’t expect me to have not reacted when he went for Allison.”

“Scott was okay with it.”

“Scott was not okay with it at all.”

“Well. Scott and Allison are back together now.”

“I don’t even understand how that works.”

“Can we not talk about this.”

“I just want you to be okay. You’ve gotten the hots for Jackson again by the looks of it.” Erica sighed. The two girls were interrupted by a loud male bellows and “What the fucks”, followed by the loud thumping of feet to the ground.  
“OPEN THE DOOR!” Stiles barked as he ran, followed by Derek who looked as pale as a sheet of paper.

“Are you guys okay?” Lydia asked, as Erica opened the door and looked at the two curiously.

“There was a snake in your restroom.” Stiles groaned.

“What do you mean there was? It’s not slithering around the house is it?” Lydia screamed.

“Nope. I have it right here.” Derek breathed, showing the girls the snake he was currently clasping. Causing the girls to recoil and almost trip over their own feet at the sight of the creature.

“Jesus! Derek take it out already.” Stiles shrieked, appearing to be the one that was less composed in the situation.

“I don’t want to get bitten.”

“Let me check the tail.” Erica sighed, “Billy the Exterminator’s advice tells me that it’s not poisonous.”

“I don’t care. I don’t want to get bitten either way.” Derek frowned.

“Just toss it over a bush or something.” Lydia cried.

“Fine.” Derek groaned. The young adult sped out of the house and the trio inside clutched their chest as they let out a breath of relief. When the young adult re-entered the house he was practically beaming.

“Are you okay?” Lydia asked cautiously, going to male to check for any gashes or bites.

“I’m perfectly fine. Good thing is that we managed to fix your shower.”

“Are you joking? You’re seriously lucky to have not been bitten.” Stiles yelled, punching the other males’ shoulder.

“Aw are you guys having a moment here? Is Stiles being the wife that worries about her husband’s health and safety?”

“Fuck off. This is serious, what if the snake were poisonous? He could have been bitten!”

“The snake wasn’t poisonous and Derek looks completely fine to me.”

“Hahaha! You shrieked!” Erica laughed, clutching her abdomen as laughter just leaked out like a broken faucet.

“It’s not funny!” Stiles protested.

“I just remembered something!” Lydia yelled hysterically, drawing the attention of the other three.

“Don’t do this to me Lyds! I love you and everything but you have to much dirt on me!”

“Of course I do! You’re my best male friend Stilinski.” Lydia laughed, “You remember when you went through that whole rocker-punk phase?”

“Scott went through the exact same thing! It just lasted for a shorter period of time.”

“That’s not what I was getting to!” Lydia grinned, turning to Erica whose face contorted into recognition.

“There was this time when you were really out of it. You hadn’t slept like the whole night and we ate some dodgy leaves... But you made out with someone.” Erica grinned, resting his arm on Lydia’s shoulders.

“Please tell me it wasn’t you!”

“No. It was Derek.” Erica laughed, turning to face Stiles, “It’s such a shame that you don’t remember because he was your first kiss.”

“And no one thought to tell me this!” Stiles screamed, facing the trio.

“I’m sorry, we thought you would remember later on.” Lydia apologized, “You ate them too Erica! Who were you kissing on?”

“Now this is the best part.” Derek laughed as he caught the blonde’s reddened face, “She was making out with her own reflection.”

“I knew you were secretly a narcissist!” Stiles laughed, “You know there was a second reason why I brought Derek over.”

“Really?” Lydia smiled.

“Well Stiles and I wanted to share the news that we’re dating.” Derek grinned, looking at the male who brightened up and nodded his head slowly in an affirmative motion.

“Aww! That is so ridiculously adorable” Erica smiled.

“We kind of already knew that you were dating a guy” Lydia laughed.

“Woah. What do you mean you already knew?”

“Well the limping and the marks on your back weren’t exactly subtle.”

“Hey! Derek has this thing where he like to mark.” Stiles blushed, “Lets go home Der-bear”

“Stiles. Never call me that in public ever again.” Derek groaned as he walked out of the apartment with Stiles in tow, “We stole your condoms. I thought I would warn you before you decided to actually have sex for once because there were only two missing from the entire box. ”

“Fuck off Derek!” Lydia and Erica yelled simultaneously.

"You know what this calls for?" Lydia grinned.

"Poptarts and vodka shots!" Erica yelled.

**fin**


End file.
